A few weeks back I looked up a bunch of emotions in both French and Spanish. Emotions that I was feeling at that moment. I keep feeling, in summation, INADEQUATE.
With everything. So, as I always do, I tried to think of a way to be okay with it. So I looked up words like “dejected” and “fear” along with a few song lyrics and wrote them down. The “x’s” are ones currently on my wall.
Each time I feel overwhelmed, I write one of the words on my dark blue wall in chalk. I just wrote “abatido” (which means dejected) a few minutes ago.
I am trying to figure things out. I’m just so thankful for the odd moments I get from time to time. Like when Jewel comes on my ipod and I hear a song I’ve never heard.
And the first few lines make me laugh at 4am.
“If you love somebody
You better let it out
Don’t hold it back
While you’re trying to figure it out”- Jewel “Satisfied“
And I really think I’m starting to feel satisfied.